One of my challenges as a leader is listening. Listening has all kinds of benefits within an organization – engenders respect, helps solve problems faster, makes the team member feel valued, encourages active participation, helps with accuracy. This is clearly a skill I want to improve at.
I’m a fast talker and my brain pings from thing to thing more quickly than a parakeeet on caffeine. This often leads to me finishing other peoples’ sentances (of course I know what they’re going to say!), talking over others or not completely listening because I’m forming my next thought while they’re still talking.
None of this is good if you’re a wife, a friend, a daughter or a boss. I’ve been working with a business coach (Shandel Slaten from True Life Coaching) on improving my listening skills with small baby steps because WOW change happens with small, incremental movement daily. One of my personal goals for the month is to use the phrase, “Tell me more....” at least once per day (and then, to be quiet!).
Want to become a better listener? Join me in this! 30 days of saying “Tell me more…” at least once per day to improve our listening skills and by default, all of our relationships.
PS – If you’re reading this in your email or through a reader, click through to check out our summery updated Soap Queen header. It’s short-sleeve season!
PS – If you’re reading this in your email or through a reader, click through to check out our summery updated Soap Queen header. It’s short-sleeve season!
inspiration says
I’ll gold frame this post with “Tell me more” and hang it in my office.
Anne-Marie says
Aw, thanks! So glad you liked it!
TeresaR says
I doubt you’d be less productive; you’d manage to work great with a new focused mind, I’m sure…but, yeah, I’d never dream of medicating it either! 🙂
Anne-Marie says
I feel like that too some days – and then I worry that if I really did have it and I medicated it that I would lose my insane productivity. =)
TeresaR says
I’ve been careful about giving people full eye contact, but I can’t seem to stop my mind from taking a trip without me. LOL! I really do think I have ADD.
Anne-Marie says
You’re in good company; we can do it together!
Anne-Marie says
Agreed! I can’t wait for the next 30 day challenge. It has to do with de-cluttering …
Anne-Marie says
We could definitely hang out … =)
Anne-Marie says
Me too! Also, as an entrepreneur, I’m often rushing to get my ideas out to start PERSUADING people to think my way (yes, that’s a great idea. yes, we can do that. yes, we should do that!) and I think that’s also where some of my poor listening skills are coming from. I’m just sharing that in case it hits a nerve with you too =)
Anne-Marie says
Holly, One thing I really noticed when I started becoming aware of this is that my staff especially don’t process like I do so when I speak too quickly and don’t give them enough time to respond, often things (great ideas, comments, questions) go unsaid and we have miscommunication. So, I’m really trying the ‘Tell me more’ and just the power of the PAUSE after I spew a bunch of commentary. So far, it’s an improvement.
Anne-Marie says
I’ve noticed that if I stare into their eyes and don’t let my eyes unlock, I tend to stay more on focus. Not sure if this is just me or if it might be others too! But try it! It’ll be a fun experiment.
aussiesoapsupplies says
Absolutely I do. David even gave me a “bundle” in my last Christmas stocking – all sizes and shapes of note pads 🙂 It is an inherited trait in my, the list making, so it’s not all bad 🙂 However, the listening thing in me needs improvement without doubt. Today I listened more. PS Me too 🙂
Anne-Marie says
(sigh) Yes, it does require a massive slow down. But, we can do it!
Anne-Marie says
I hope you join me in the ‘Tell me More’ experiment. =)
Anne-Marie says
Try it for thirty days and tell me where it gets you =)
Anne-Marie says
OMG! Do you have multiple notebooks of lists too? I’m so guilty of that as well.
PS – Can’t wait to see you in August!
Anne-Marie says
LOL.
Anne-Marie says
Thank you on all counts. =)
Anne-Marie says
He he … I’ll tell you a secret. I sometimes multi task and do emails while people talk to me. I’m not ready to ‘resolution’ that away but the ‘Tell me more’ is a good baby step. =)
Anne-Marie says
Me too. Me too. You and me can be our own little support group.
Sarahleesoaps says
Oh you are so right! You are not alone, I finish sentences for others all the time. Almost immediately after I do so I am embarrassed that I was so rude. I need to work on this too. 🙂
Mayren says
I love this idea, will try it out and also pass it along. Incredibly positive movement that can have amazing results when applied.
Ann-Marie you are such a win-win thinker!
Good luck all – See ya in 30 days!
Odette says
I hear what you are saying- I am like an Energiser bunny on “crack”
Lianne393 says
I am Guilty for this too. But when we are used to doing so much in a day, I think it’s normal to think faster than we can act. Actually, that said I have issues when it comes to talking properly sometimes. I’ll talk so fast, that the words will come in the wrong order, sometimes even with a single word. My bf’s brother baught himself a telescope, and I said, “That’s a nice Skeletope” lol LOL
Holly says
Wow – your second paragraph really struck a note with me! I feel fortunate to be able to process so much information quickly, but really need to let other people respond in their own time-frame…and let them finish their own sentences! Bravo, Anne-Marie, for addressing this important communication issue and bringing it to the forefront so we can all be successful!
TeresaR says
Yes! I really need to do this too. I don’t usually finish other people’s sentences, but I do zone out when others talk to me. :}
kellyanntaylor says
Oh, yes, Tell me more. Family hates this and I do it all the time. Finishing people’s sentences. I love the earbuds to the heart. That is a great picture.
Tell me more more more. I guess this requires us to slow down a tad, eh?
2leis says
What a helpful thought for the month! I’m on it! Chatty Cathy here always formulating at the speed of light. Thank you for sharing the most meaningful tips, anecdotes and solutions!
Littlegemsbykari says
I’m in! I could def learn a lot from this life lesson!
aussiesoapsupplies says
Oh, Anne-Marie, “Tell me More” – I do these things too. Thoughts faster than words, lists forming before I have finished the last! I’ll start this challenge too 🙂
Som's Studio says
Ok. Tell me more. 🙂
Donna Maria Coles Johnson says
OK, I’m in. “Tell me more.” And I love the new header! Cute. Parakeet on caffeine: nice. Very nice.
Thefragrantmuse says
Wonderful post, Anne-Marie, especially for a Type A person like me who rushes and doesn’t always listen. Today I’m listening and interested. Go on Anne-Marie, tell me more… 🙂
Inner Earth Soaps says
Oh I’m terrible at this … my brain jumps around alot too and I’m always finishing others’ sentences and interrupting. *blushes* I think I’d better start using this phrase too!