You were born with potential.
You were born with goodness and trust.
You were born with ideals and dreams.
You were born with greatness.
You were born with wings.
You are not meant for crawling, so don’t.
You have wings.
Learn to use them, and fly.
— Rumi
It’s December. The hustle and bustle of the holiday season is well upon us all. If you’re like many families, rather than holding your family closer, you’re struggling to get it all done. This blog post series is designed to put you and me in a frame to better appreciate the holidays and more importantly, better appreciate our lives every day.
Stop Doing List
There are things in our lives that we love to do, that give us energy, that expand our horizons, that make the view of the world seem just a little brighter than before. Then, there are things that we dread to do, that bring us down every time and make our lives seem like one boring trudge after another.
Some of those things, you have to do. The trash needs to get emptied. The dog needs to get walked. You’ve got to deal with (insert least favorite relative here) during the holidays. But there are some things that we do because we feel like we need to – we serve on a board because we don’t have the heart to get off of the board, we sign up to teach Sunday School when our heart isn’t in it, or we keep our mouths shut when the bank teller calls us by our incorrect name, yet again.
Guess what? Everything you’re doing right now that doesn’t bring you joy, that doesn’t expand your horizons and that doesn’t fill you with energy is taking away from your family, it’s taking away from you and it’s taking away from your growing business.
Take five minutes write now to write an Expansion/Contraction List. On the Expansion side are things that you LOVE to do, things that fill you with joy, things that make you feel like you could scale a mountain, the things in your life that you want to do more of. On the Contraction side are things that you hate to do, that you dread doing, that you feel drained every single time you do them. Go ahead, get petty, write it all down, get it all out!
Once you have your lists, the next part is easier said than done. But it’s the first step to enjoying the holidays AND 2012. Commit to doing less of THREE things on your Contraction list and commit to doing more of THREE things on your Expansion list.
You define ‘more’ for you. It will vary with each person but you must define it. If you don’t get specific about how much more time you’re going to spend smelling the roses rather than washing your windows, you probably won’t do it and you won’t be able to see a measurable result in your mood and outlook towards life. In order to make more time for those things that enliven you and make you say “Whooo Hoo!”, you’ve got to quit doing other things, preferably things that don’t inspire you or things that you hate doing.
This concept didn’t originate with me. I’ve heard it time and time again from great leaders but it bears repeating: you are what you do repeatedly, day in and day out. This December and in 2012, do more of the things that energize you, that make you feel good and that lead you to your goals. It all starts by making that list and writing everything down – so do just that, today.
Wow! Anne-Marie, you are such a sweetheart. I feel almost as if I know you, what with these videos and these posts of yours. I feel as if you’re mentoring me/us 🙂 Thank you for the uplifting posts and the amazing info you profide. You are so appreciated.
Hugs!
Andrea
Great idea, thank you! I’ve never thought about things I need to stop doing, it always seems like the list of to do keeps expanding instead so it’s good to sit back and see what can be pared down.
That was just what I needed Anne-Marie!
After a wirlwind few weeks of spending all my time on family, friends, renovations, presents, planning for christmas, work etc, (with no end in sight), the stress got to me and the one thing I love to do, which is Lotion making, ended up a disgusting horrible mess. I’ve learned over time that if I’m stressed my products tend to mirror my emotions. So your post is fabulous timing. I will go make my lists right now!
I was looking forward to your “end of year” post this year – I was so inspired by your series last year!
This theme is perfect for me right now. I recently gave up a prestigious volunteer position, not because I’ve lost faith in the cause, but because I came to realize that the position and the work had unfortunately moved in the “dreaded” category, to the point where I would feel sick to my stomach at the thought of organizing another meeting or facing my inbox. It was a hard decision to give it up, because of the sense of obligation and my belief in the cause. But volunteer work is supposed to be something nourishing, and this situation was simply the opposite.
I’m looking forward to making these lists and thinking about my decision in this context – I can replace that thing that was draining me with something that brings me joy! I’ll be a happier person for it, and I’m sure I will find other ways to “give back” once I’ve regained some of my energy!
I love this post. I think it is something we all know… but forget or don’t pay attention to it… so thank you for the reminder! I am going to think about this and DO IT. xo Jen
More soap, more exercise, more creativity. Less computer, yelling, spending 🙂
Love it! My ‘keep’ list definitely involves more family time (which less travel will get me). I love the less computer time. It is such a time sucker!
I’ve already pared down as many things I don’t want to do in my life as I can and I still can’t find enough time to do everything. *sigh* But, it is a great idea for a lot of other people I know!
I know what you mean; I was introduced to this list making technique 5ish years ago and have soooooo thankfully been following it and practicing it yearly but still, there is backsliding. And ‘no red eyes’ has never been on there – and amen to that! My health is worth more than flying for 5 hours through the night and not sleeping! =)
I wish my stop doing was only 3 things lol..
LOL is right. I’m super lucky that I was introduced to this concept about five years ago and have slowly been working my way down but realistically? I can only work on three things per year! I make 4-5 goals for the year and then a few ‘stop doings’ and if I make progress on them, it’s a huge success in my mind. Baby steps lead to great things …
One of my favorite songs right now is Mumford & Son’s Awake My Soul. I especially take the meaning of the chorus to heart:
“In these bodies we will live, in these bodies we will die
Where you invest your love, you invest your life.”
Your blog post reminds me of that, of the importance of being intentional.
I feel like I’ve missed out on a major part of music to not have heard that little gem of a song before (fixed that though – thank you iTunes and its easy accessibility).
Intentional. I like that word. And, I’d like to intentionally spend time in 2012 with quality friends who make me laugh, make me think and make me aspire to better. You, my friend, are included in that.